this is the wedding video of Gemma
Berford a 25-year-old Oxford graduate
who became Gemma Anleila when Gemma
Berford a brilliant Oxford graduate went
to Tanzania for a charity project she
never considered falling in love and
marrying a Masai warrior but sometimes
love can be found in the most unexpected
places despite their vastly different
backgrounds Gemma married the African
man but their union had many challenges
what became of their marriage is Gemma
and the African Warriors still together
and what does her life look like 21
years later let’s find out an unlikely
love story gemma met Lesar Ole Nungila
while volunteering in the village of
Elui lesar was a Messiah warrior and the
son of a Masai herdsman he lived in Elui
a remote mountain village near Arouchia
in northern Tanzania he grew up with 16
brothers and sisters not to mention a
father mother two stepmothers and
innumerable aunts uncles cousins second
cousins and neighbors he went to primary
school when he was 11 but could not
finish his formal education because of a
severe drought which meant he had to
lead his cattle to more distant pastures
in search of water he was a strong
warrior who often defended his livestock
against lions leopards and buffalo armed
only with a spear and a knife while
hurting on the open plains Gemma first
met Lesar when she visited an arts and
crafts fair in Arouchia Tanzania in
March 1999 while taking a two-week break
from her fourth year of study at Oxford
they were introduced when Lesar
performed with a Masai dance troop at
the craft festival he wore traditional
robes and beads and they said just hello
because he couldn’t speak English gemma
also did not know how to speak Swahili
or understand the language she was
immediately attracted to him and thought
he was nice but thought no more about it
before Gemma flew home however she
bumped into him and his friends again
and they told her about the charity
organization called
Angion they were setting it up to help
preserve their traditional culture and
she agreed to do whatever she could to
help after her two weeks break ended
Gemma returned home to complete her
studies in Oxford however after Gemma
returned to school Lesar was elected
chairman of the AN serial charity
organization at home she told all her
friends about the people of Tanzania and
her experiences there she also told them
about the young warrior that she met
over there quite often she caught
herself thinking about Lesar and it
became little more than a fond
memory after graduating from Oxford
Gemma returned to Tanzania and became
involved with Angie
she used the opportunity to forge ahead
with her building and future program
with
Angrian gemma had started learning
Swahili and she taught Lesiear some
English so they could communicate better
than when they first met she often met
with Leicar in her spare time to discuss
their charity projects which included
building a small village school in Elui
they had known each other for over a
year at this point and they had lots of
common interests for example Gemma
majored in natural medicines for her
degree and Lesar’s tribe harvested and
used herbs for their treatment during
one of her visits he invited her to trek
and meet his family in their village the
distance from the city to their village
was very far and it took almost a day to
reach by truck and on foot but his
family was very welcoming she and Lesar
were strongly attracted to each other
but were very aware of their different
backgrounds and were cautious about
starting a relationship so when Gemma
traveled back to Britain she decided to
get into a relationship with 29-year-old
Alex Bell a fellow graduate from Oxford
so that she could forget about
Lesar gemma had met Alex at work and had
been friends for a long time they were
very comfortable in each other’s company
so it was easy to grow their friendship
into romance the relationship didn’t
last though as it was not founded on
love it ended a few months later when
Gemma experienced a life-changing ordeal
why did it end after she graduated from
Oxford University Gemma got a job with a
medical research company in Oxford and
was sent back to Arouchia in the year
2000 to help set up a medical conference
it was on this trip to Tanzania in
December 2000 that Gemma had a
terrifying ordeal at 35,000 ft when the
plane she was on got hijacked the plane
nose dived and the cabin rocked
violently from side to side gemma’s
stomach was in her mouth the passenger
next to her was praying and others were
screaming gemma tried to convince
herself the plane had simply hit a patch
of turbulence but the reality was far
worse the British Airways flight from
Gatwick to Nairobi had been hijacked a
man had broken into the cockpit and
thrown himself at the controls
threatening the lives of the pilot and
the 396 passengers including Brian Ferry
and Jamaima Khan now the engines were
shrieking and alarms were ringing gemma
thought she was going to die after a
struggle the man was eventually
overpowered by passengers and crew and
tied to a chair until landing still the
ordeal had life-changing consequences
for a 22-year-old Gemma she had never
been so terrified which made her think
about her life she pictured the people
she wanted to say goodbye to and what
she would have said to them but the man
on Gemma’s mind wasn’t Alex Bell her
boyfriend and fellow Oxford graduate
with whom Gemma had discussed marriage
it was the 23-year-old Messiah warrior
called Lesar Oling Gila who grew up in a
mud hut hunting his food and before they
met spoke barely a word of English at
that point she realized that her
feelings for Lesar ran far deeper until
then she thought she was in love with
Alex who she had been dating for 4
months but when the plane landed the
first person she wanted to talk to apart
from her mom and dad was Lesar knowing
the huge impact falling in love with a
Messiah tribesman would have on her life
Gemma decided to keep quiet about her
feelings she kept telling herself not to
fall in love with a man who lives on the
other side of the world however she
inevitably started to notice Lacar’s
muscles and lovely smile and the
chemistry was obvious when his hand
touched hers but still she didn’t say
anything about how she felt and just
flew home when she finished her
conference work fate intervened again
when in April 2001 Gemma was asked to
()
fly back to Tanzania for a further
six-month project lesar agreed to act as
Gemma’s translator and just days into
the trip a taxi driver asked him “So
when are you going to marry this lady?”
They were both slightly embarrassed by
the question but Gemma decided it was
time to tell Leicar how she felt back at
her hotel she told him she had something
really important to say and he sat
patiently until she eventually blurted
out “I think I’m falling in love with
you.” Lesar smiled and replied slowly
“We’ve been in love for a long time.” He
admitted he had always loved her but
didn’t think he had any chance then he
kissed her which was a wonderful
experience as Gemma later admitted when
a Messiah man tells a woman he loves her
it’s unsaid that it means he wants to
marry her so Lesar never actually
proposed but it was assumed they would
marry because they were in love in Masai
society casual partnerships are only
accepted between teenagers so the pair
decided to get married the following
morning Gemma wasted no time in emailing
Alex telling him she had met someone
else she would be getting married to do
you know Alex was more offended at
having been dumped by email than he was
at losing her he didn’t even love her
that much next Gemma phoned her parents
after she told her dad the news her mom
refused to come on the phone and talk to
her because she was so
upset anxious to put her mother’s mind
at rest gemma sent her a long email
explaining how happy she was with Lesar
and that he was the love of her life her
mom eventually came around and wrote
back saying she was worried about her
getting hurt meanwhile Lesar broke the
news to his family who were equally
shocked it was an unlikely match and
both families felt nervous about the
love affair in June 2001 Gemma’s parents
joined her in Arouchia to meet Lesar and
his family and in September Lesar made
his first trip to England it’s not every
day that a Masai warrior visits England
to say that Lesiear causes a stir when
he strolls around Berscelon Hampshire in
full traditional dress is an
understatement thanks to his improved
English Peter and Sue Gemma’s parents
got to know him better and approved the
relationship in January 2003 Gemma
married Lesar Oling Gila the African
warrior in a traditional Masai ceremony
at the age of 25 the wedding took place
in Elui and was attended by Gemma’s
family and 500 Messiah gemma’s parents
Sue and Peter Berford of Southampton had
traveled with Pam and Paul their two
sons to Tanzania for the wedding gemma
wore a wedding dress made of beaded oxin
and received goats and cattle as gifts
adapting to life in a tribal village was
a huge challenge but Gemma was
determined to weather it as she had
chosen that life there was no
electricity in the home the roads were
bad especially when they had a drought
and they had to walk almost a kilometer
to get water despite this hardship Gemma
seemed happy with her new life lesar
later built a new mud hut for his family
which cost about £2,000 to build and was
a mansion by village standards gemma
installed an electric hob and solar
panels in the home to make life more
comfortable though they still had to
walk a distance to get water from the
village’s water pump the couple also had
a flat in a nearby town that Gemma used
as her workspace as a research
consultant gemma and Lesar welcomed
their first daughter Lucia in April 2004
the year after their marriage their
second daughter Susanna was born in
September
2005 their relationship was a culture
shock to everyone there was some
resistance to Gemma in the village
initially however it was no longer an
issue once they married and had kids the
idea was then a reality and the people
accepted her accomplishments and
challenges their shared interest in
social causes strengthened the marriage
between Gemma and Lesar together they
co-founded initiatives to support
women’s rights and end harmful gender
practices one of their most prominent
accomplishments was building a community
school in Elawaii Village the school
uses a curriculum that fuses traditional
Masai and formal knowledge with a unique
co-curricular program to preserve
indigenous knowledge about medicinal
plants through the non-governmental
organization Angerion the couple
developed programs that empowered young
people to document and research the
indigenous knowledge of their societies
the program sustained biological and
cultural diversity and bridged the
generation gap often arising from formal
education gemma and Lesar also dedicated
themselves to various charity endeavors
including campaigns to combat female
genital mutilation female genital
mutilation in Masai communities is a
cultural practice involving the removal
of young girls genitals as a right of
passage from girlhood to adulthood the
age at which it is carried out depends
on the community but the practice is
most commonly performed under age 15 it
is estimated that at least 200 million
girls and women alive today have
undergone female genital cutting mainly
in Africa with an estimated 7.9 million
Tanzanian women between 15 and 49 years
being recorded according to the United
Nations Population Fund female genital
mutilation violates human rights
principles and standards including the
principles of equality and
non-discrimination based on gender the
right to freedom from torture or cruel
inhuman or degrading punishment the
right to the highest attainable standard
of health the rights of the child the
right to physical and mental integrity
and even the right to life
anthropological and sociological
research links the practice to beliefs
about fertility appropriate sexual
behavior hygiene and beauty in some
communities the practice is a right of
passage into womanhood and thus linked
to marriage ability and childbearing
while in others it links to religious
requirements or ethnic identity the
Masai community believes that a curse
will follow girls who do not undergo it
female genital mutilation is a harmful
practice as some girls die from
excessive bleeding and many suffer
serious long-term complications for the
rest of their lives gemma introduced
different initiatives to end the
barbaric act for example she provided
education to the community about the
dangerous effects of female genital
mutilation on their girls she introduced
alternative rights of passage where a
girl undergoes all traditional rights of
passage education but without the cut
she also trained rural women to use the
power of song to eradicate the ancient
tradition of female genital
mutilation in addition to their
philanthropy work she and Lesar also
started a safari company called Oureti
which specializes in giving tourists an
insight into the Masai they engaged in
tours that allowed people to explore
Africa up close including staying at
Masai villages and learning traditional
crafts the couple appeared happy moments
together leading many to believe in the
possibility of a fairy tale ending to
their story however in 2010 their
marriage ended the exact cause of their
separation remains unknown
speculation suggests that Lesar may have
desired to take a second wife a common
polygamous practice among Masai men
which Gemma was unwilling to accept
since the wealth of a Masai man is
measured by the number of children he
has Lesar moved on and had more children
with other wives gemma was so angry
about his decision and decided to leave
him after their separation Gemma
returned to the United Kingdom with her
two daughters and they still keep in
touch with Tanzania their homeland but
there hasn’t been much news about Leicar
since then her life today it has been 21
years since Gemma made the life-changing
decision to get married to Lesar she is
now 47 years old and still actively
involved in advocacy and empowerment
through education and sustainable
practices professionally Gemma Berford
is now a co-director and former research
associate of the global initiative for
traditional systems of health and
co-editor of the world health
organization global atlas on traditional
complimentary and alternative medicine
she is a healer and transformational
facilitator an internationally acclaimed
author writing on well-being and
sustainability she now lives in the
United Kingdom using what she learned in
Africa and in the sacred landscapes of
southern England to help people
rediscover their inner peace purpose
passion and power through her 19 songs
of
reunion her daughter Lucia is now 21
years old she is already a successful
young woman and a
photographer just like her mom she
enjoys volunteering and helping others
she is even the director of Elevate
Young Minds a youth organization that
works on finding solutions to local and
global problems susanna her younger
sister is 20 years old but there aren’t
many details about her life it was a
crazy love between two people from
different worlds gemma gave up her
western life in Oxford for a Masai
warrior and Lesar agreed to marry a
foreigner and violate the customs of his
tribe they could have been happy but
perhaps the gap between their worlds was
too wide let’s delve briefly into where
it all
began gemma Berford the Tanzania lover
()
gemma was born in 1978 in Old Bersan a
quiet village in Hampshire in the south
of England
gemma was the only child of a
middle-class English couple her mother
Sue worked in a library and her father
Peter was an accountant when Gemma was
still very young she exhibited
remarkable aptitude for learning did you
know that she taught herself to read
when she was just 18 months old yes you
heard that right well this was perceived
as unusual then and her parents had to
take her to seek the opinion of
educational
psychologists after a thorough
examination Gemma was diagnosed as a
highly gifted child with a high IQ
during her childhood she wrote several
poems and novels was very good at
playing the violin and volunteered for
charity organizations
she showcased her academic excellence
when she sat for and gained 13 GCSE A
grades and four A levels because of this
exceptional accomplishment she was
admitted to the prestigious Oxford
University at 17 there she pursued a
degree in biochemistry and was
determined to make the best out of it
she graduated with a master’s degree at
the age of 21 during her time in Oxford
she did not limit herself to classroom
education but got involved in social
causes and humanitarian services gemma
was determined to make a difference in
the world even though her academic
pursuits were demanding she still found
time to engage deeply with various
charitable activities you would always
find her in fundraising outreaches and
she was always ready to volunteer for
causes that she knew would bring a
change to humanity her involvement in
these humanitarian activities laid the
foundation that would define her future
path in 1999 Gemma was in the final year
of her biochemistry degree and took a
break from her studies she traveled to
Tanzania to assist a charity preserving
traditional African cultures her stay in
Tanzania was a wholesome experience for
her she was introduced to the Masai
community and fell in love with the
people the Masai community is known for
its rich cultural heritage and unique
traditions they put so much effort into
preserving their tradition and culture
so it doesn’t go extinct in the face of
modernization and this was what made
Gemma love them and decide to settle
there upon her arrival in Tanzania Gemma
joined a charity organization called
Angerion which means house of peace in
the Masai language angserion is a
registered Tanzanian cultural
association set up to promote preserve
and document the traditional cultures of
East Africa build self-esteem among
youth and uphold the rights of
indigenous peoples the organization
offers two main volunteer programs the
teach and learn program and the building
for the future program gemma chose the
building for the future program and was
tasked to help build a school in the
remote village of Elui a project to
integrate indigenous knowledge into
formal
education despite lacking financial
resources Gemma committed wholeheartedly
to the cause and was determined to see
its reality that was the start of her
relationship with the community and its
people as her work in Eli progressed
Gemma learned more about the people and
their way of life she participated in
daily activities attended ceremonies and
cultural events and gradually earned the
community’s trust and respect because of
her charming and endearing nature she
was able to make friends with many
villagers during this period Gemma met
Lesar Ole Ningila a proud Masai warrior
who later became her husband like Gemma
the Masai warrior is deeply interested
in community development and culture
preservation this brought them close and
soon it evolved into a life-changing
partnership however this didn’t last
forever what do you think was the real
reason for their divorce can you marry
someone from an entirely different race
drop your answers in the comments if
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