“SEVEN SELL-OUTS AND COUNTING — BUT THIS ONE BROKE THE SOUND BARRIER!”: Murph Declares Today’s Crowd the Wildest Yet

Seven straight sellouts is already impressive for a team that not long ago could barely sell enough tickets to cover the hot dog stand.

But today the streak turned into something else entirely — something wild, unhinged, and possibly loud enough to be measured by NASA.

Even Murph, who has seen more stadiums and more noise than your average construction worker standing next to a jackhammer, admitted he had no clue how this crowd managed to outdo themselves, saying with a straight face, “I don’t know what we did.

It just seems louder, wilder. ”

The world collectively went, “Yeah, sure Murph, you don’t know. ”

Because it’s not like the beer lines were twice as long and the pregame tailgate started three days ago.

Already, the conspiracy theories are flying, with some fans swearing the team secretly piped in extra noise like it’s the NFL circa 2014.

Others insist that a mysterious group of “professional screamers” were hired off Craigslist to yell in perfect unison at frequencies known to shatter glass.

While Murph stood there looking like a man who just discovered crowd decibels are a renewable energy source, the rest of us were piecing together exactly why this sellout felt like a minor natural disaster.

It starts with the fact that seven sellouts in a row have built up a kind of mania in this city that makes people act like their ticket is a golden key to a post-apocalyptic safe zone.

By the time fans get inside, they’re already in a survival-mode mindset, ready to scream as if their lives depend on it.

And maybe they do, because honestly, the vibe today was that if you weren’t yelling loud enough, someone in the next row would hand you a beer and tell you to try again.

It’s not just the volume — it’s the chaos.

The kind of chaotic energy that makes you think at least one person in the stadium is going to try to wrestle the mascot before the fourth quarter.

There’s Murph, pretending he’s baffled, while every local bar within a five-mile radius reported record-breaking sales this morning.

A suspicious coincidence that even the most polite fan is willing to point out with a wink.

Because nothing fuels “louder and wilder” quite like bottomless mimosas and a general disregard for tomorrow’s hangover.

But maybe it’s not alcohol.

Maybe it’s pure civic pride.

Maybe it’s the fact that after seven straight games of this sold-out fever dream, people have decided their vocal cords are now a weapon of mass intimidation — something to deploy against visiting teams like a psychological warfare tactic.

And let’s be honest, nothing terrifies a rookie more than looking up from the field and seeing 40,000 people screaming like they’ve all just received the same overdue bill in the mail.

Yes, Murph can play humble and pretend this was an accident.

But we’ve seen this game before.

We know that somewhere deep in the team offices there’s a little whiteboard that says “GOAL: LOUDER THAN LAST TIME” with a list underneath that includes “cheaper beer,” “extra bass in the stadium speakers,” and “play the hype video twice just in case. ”

Because this doesn’t just happen — this is an operation.

The result is a scene that makes normal human conversation impossible.

One fan described it as “trying to read lips during a jet engine test. ”

Another said they couldn’t hear their own thoughts for three full quarters — which, for some people, was probably a blessing.

The crowd loved every second of it, feeding off each other’s madness like it was a competitive sport.

You can tell this was different because, by the end, even the ushers looked like they’d been through a war zone, clutching their clipboards like shields.

The team is already thinking about how to keep this going, because nothing sells tickets like the promise of being part of a noise record — even if the record is unofficial and probably not scientifically measured.

That didn’t stop one guy from showing up with a homemade decibel meter and claiming the crowd hit 137, which is roughly the volume of a military jet taking off.

Murph laughed when asked if he’d ever experienced anything like it, saying “No” in that way where you know he’s already picturing this in his future Hall of Fame induction speech.

While the official story will be that the fans simply brought “extra energy,” the unofficial version is way juicier.

It involves a social media campaign that encouraged people to “make noise like your ex is in the other section,” free souvenir cowbells that mysteriously appeared on seats without explanation, and a fourth-quarter chant that could probably be heard from space.

Of course, like all legendary sports moments, there are skeptics.

The grumpy old-timers say, “It’s not the same as the old stadium” or “These kids don’t know real noise. ”

But that didn’t stop them from screaming themselves hoarse in the final minutes.

Once you’re in it, you can’t help it — you become part of the mob.

The mob is hungry for volume, for chaos, for that intoxicating high of being louder than the laws of physics recommend.

Now the legend of Sellout Number Seven is already solidifying.

It’s being exaggerated in real time.

People will swear the ground shook.

They’ll claim players on the other team couldn’t hear their own play calls.

They’ll say the Gatorade on the sideline vibrated like in Jurassic Park.

In ten years, when people talk about it, they’ll leave out the part about the guy in section 112 who lost his voice in the first quarter and just mouthed “WOOOO” for the rest of the game.

Legends don’t need all the facts.

They just need Murph standing there, pretending he’s confused, while secretly knowing this was the perfect storm of fandom, beer, and the universal human desire to be part of something that feels bigger than life itself.

The only real question now is how they’re going to top it for Sellout Number Eight.

After today, the bar has been set somewhere between “rock concert” and “volcanic eruption. ”

We’re not sure if that’s a challenge or a warning.